Have you been getting love and relationship advice from Cosmo lately? Do you pick up dating tips from the latest Hollywood movie or TV show? Well, that’s the reason you’re having problems. Popular magazines, movies and TV shows offer plenty of tips and examples on finding dates, meeting men, what to do on a date and what to do with your date later that night, but their portrayal of the elements that need to come together to build a strong, healthy long term love and relationship aren’t realistic. So, here are some tips that you can actually use in real life for a strong love and relationship with your man.
If you look at most love and relationship advice the main topic is about building trust because it is the foundation of any relationship. Trust is something which must be time, but there are things you can do which may help. What can you do? Be reliable. This is something you can do immediately. If you’ll be late or need to cancel a date, give him a call. If you promise something, follow through. And don’t make promises you can’t or won’t keep. Mean what you say and only say what you mean.
Another way to build trust is to try to understand your man’s feelings. It’s easy to allow a disagreement to turn into a personal attack. One misspoken word can break the trust you’ve worked so hard to build up. Allow him to have his own feelings and respect the fact that they may be different from yours, he needs to trust that you understand these contrasts as situations arise in your love and relationship.
Don’t ignore money matters!
I know you’ve heard this advice before. Money, may not really be the root of all evil, but it is the cause of many break ups and divorces, so keeping an eye on your finances is important. If you share any financial responsibilities, make sure you communicate with each other, especially when there’s an issue. By communicating about money regularly and planning your finances you can eliminate some of the serious trouble that can be caused by poor planning.
Even if only one of you is working and supports the other, both of you should be involved in financial planning. Taking some time once a month, to look at your financial situation, you can do this while paying the bills, can lessen the stress that money can bring to a relationship.
Learn to end arguments!
Even the happiest of couples have arguments. You man may have really annoying habits that you overlook when times are good. However, when you’ve had a bad day, that habit can spark a shouting match. You may think that the best thing to do is to avoid arguing all together, good luck with that one. Your best solution is not to try to stop if from happening but to know how to stop one once it’s started. The ability or inability to diffuse post-argument tension can make or break even the most strongest love and relationship.
So, when you realize your yelling and griping session is getting out of control, try some gentle humor. Say something kind to him or acknowledge that you both share the same goals. If that doesn’t work, take a break and clear your head. Think to yourself, is this argument really worth it.
Talk about what matters!
How do two people who share a love and relationship end up leading completely separate lives? Most often it starts with a breakdown in communication, especially the deep communication that’s needed to maintain a strong relationship. This real life relationship-sustaining communication is the day-to-day talks you have about your feeling, your hopes and your fears as a couple. This is not talking about who’s going to walk the dog or who’s coming over for dinner next week.
Keeping a relationship going strong takes trust, good communication and attention to the things that matter to you, as a couple. Don’t get sidetracked by the latest magazine headlines, the happy ending on the movie you’re watching, the perfectly matched couple who can solve any marital problem in 30 minutes or less or the latest Hollywood stars advice on how to have a picture perfect marriage. Remember it’s not about how often he send you roses or what you do in bed, it’s about the things that let you know that your love and relationship can stand the test of time.